I made a decision which has been difficult for me. Decisions such as these have always been, well, difficult. I’ll be taking a couple of weeks off from running. I have an injury to my foot that is as of yet undiagnosed but causes pain with each step.
A few years ago I would have sunk into a depression because I would have continued to run through the injury until it simply became too painful. It has taken me a while, but I have become more agreeable to listening to the stories being told by my body. I am looking forward to a trip to Florida in another month and not being able to run on the beaches when would certainly contribute to feeling sad.
I have spent much of the last week rising and testing my foot. I ran earlier in the week and grimaced through the first several hundred yards of a run that simply felt awful. My denial remained on high alert and I deluded myself into believing the pain had subsided so “maybe I can get a few miles in tomorrow”. Throughout the day soreness and stiffness returned and I knew if I held on to the belief that running would be returning the next day, depression would not be far behind. Advil, that wonderful controller of physical pain and discomfort raises its ugly double edged sword at me. Discomfort is well controlled and with that control comes the euphoria of being pain free and a longing for a run increases. I behooves me to listen, really listen to those stories being told by my body.
A combination of being busy and not getting enough rest I am sure are the culprits behind this injury. The candle can only be burned from both ends for so long before the flame reaches the center, flickers, and burns out.
I have found happiness in this decision. I have also learned, lo these many years, that happiness, especially in these circumstances is about being content with my present circumstances.
I’ll use this time wisely to continue yoga, read the books which have been rapidly piling up and go with my dog for those lengthier walks by the water’s edge.